"a deep, financial joy shone in her eyes" (48)The second story is a narrated in part by Buffalo Bill's horse, who is given to a little girl who is the niece of the commander of a calvary fort in the old west.
"The vast majority of the race, whether savage or civilized, are secretly kind-hearted and shrink from inflicting pain, but in the presence of the aggressive and pitiless minority they don't dare to assert themselves." (118)
"God who could make good children as easily as bad, yet preferred to make bad ones; who could have made everyone happy, yet never made a single happy one; who made them prize their bitter life, yet stingily cut it short; who gave his angels eternal happiness unearned, yet required his other children to earn it; who gave his angels painless lives, yet cursed his other children with biting miseries and maladies of mind and body; who mouths justice and invented hell--mouths mercy and invented hell--mouths Golden Rules, and forgiveness multiplied by seventy times seven, and invented hell; who mouths morals to other people and has none himself; who frowns upon crimes, yet commits them all; who created man without invitation, then tries to shuffle the responsibility for man's acts upon man, instead of honorably placing it where it belongs, upon himself; and finally, with altogether divine obtuseness, invites this poor, abused slave to worship him!" (139)
"of the best blood of Kentucky, the bluest Blue-grass aristocracy, very proud and acrimonious--or maybe it is ceremonious. I don't know which it is. But it is no matter; size is the main thing about a word, and that one's up to standard." (149)The third story is a description of Heaven as experienced by Captain Stormfield.
"Singing hymns and waving palm branches through all eternity is pretty when you hear about it in the pulpit, but it's as poor a way to put in valuable time as a body could contrive. It would just make a heaven of warbling ignoramuses, don't you see?" (241)Next is a short fable that falls flat.
Next is a description of Twain's recurring dreams about his eternally fifteen-year-old imaginary sweetheart.
Next is an amusing story about a turkey who outsmarts a boy who is hunting it.
Finally is a funny story about the more than worthless burglar alarm system that a man had installed in his house.
Year Read: 1999
Libertarian Essays by Roy Halliday
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