The Power of Judyism
by Judy Tenuta

A poor joke expanded to book length. She commands the reader to worship her and refers to the reader in insulting terms a la Don Rickles. Much of the book is about being fat, evidently this is her biggest concern. Here are the funniest lines:
"I was so religious that at the dinner table every Easter I'd shout, 'Jesus rose from the dead, have a chocolate egg.'" (25)

"'It's no mystery, sis,' I replied. 'The Blessed Trinity is a lot like the Three Stooges. You see, God the Father is mean and bossy like Moe and he yells orders out to Curly who is like Jesus. And Moe says, 'Hey, muttonhead, go down to oith and save your fellow man, by hangin' on the cross.' And Curly says, 'But I hate nails . . . woo-woo-woo-woo-woo, nya-a-a, rruff, rruff!' And of course Larry is just like the Holy Ghost: He's around somewhere, but you never really notice him." (31)

"This guy was going to night school to evolve a thumb." (46)

"Indiana is a nice place if you're a corn husk." (46)

"He says, 'The Rabbi told us that God got really mad at the Jews after they built a great big Golden Calf so He made them leave Israel and go far away.
'Where did He make them go?'
He thinks for a minute and says, 'To Florida.'" (50)

Year Read: 1998


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